Often, when
I ask clients what they want in their lives or how they'd like their lives to
be, I get the negatives. Usually it's something like, I don't want:
·
to
worry about money…my job… marriage… parents…
·
my
kid to fail in school…get in trouble…have a car accident…
·
to
drink so much…have a messy house…stay out so late…
·
to
be overweight…lazy…jealous…
·
my
relationship to fail…to be boring…to make me sad…
Yeah, yeah,
I say, in a nice way. That’s what you don't want, but what do you want? Then my clients get really clever and tell me,
I want:
·
my
partner to stop spending so much money…
·
my
kid to stop getting Fs…
·
people
to stop offering me drinks when I say no…
·
my
family to stop eating junkfood so I can too…
·
my
partner to be more romantic…
Yeah, yeah, I
say, putting on my life coach hat, but what do you want to be different in your
life right now. How can you be in action about it today? And while you're at
it, let's make it something you can control yourself. Ah, my clients say, you mean,
I will:
·
save
$50 dollars each week
·
spend
15 minutes daily helping my kid get organized
·
limit
my drinking to 2 glasses of wine, 2 nights a week
·
buy
healthier foods to cook 5 days a week
·
suggest
that Friday be our weekly date night
Yes! Yes!
Yes! That's exactly what I mean. When you want things to change, this is the secret.
Focus on what you do want, today. Be specific and authentic about what you can do to make the
change, including the what, where and when. You are the expert on your own
life. You know the steps you need to be taking. You just have to think about it
in these practical terms and start doing it. Today.This blog was originally published at YourTango.
