Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Relationship Health and Satisfaction Messages

Psychology Today, always interesting, asks, Are you with the right mate?  Really, what most of us are asking is, How can I be in a more healthy and satisfying relationship?, which is exactly what the article addresses.  My take on the article’s tips:

*Surprise, surprise!  The early infatuation with your partner will fade.
*No matter how much it feels like they are, your partner is not responsible for your happiness.
*As with most important things in life, it’s up to you to create the relationship you want.
*It helps to start with identifying your relationship needs.
*Then you have to get the message out there and try to get your needs met.
*At the same time, you must try to understand and meet your partner’s needs.
*You and your spouse are different (and it would be terribly boring if you weren’t).
*It’s important to recognize that you cannot get all your needs met in one relationship.
*Relationships are dynamic, they’re always changing.  It’s a good thing.

And keep in mind, as the Gottman’s have pointed out with respect to communication in relationships, more positive talk and less negative talk are important to your relationship’s health.

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