The Zen Of Wellness

Does the thought of creating a wellness plan trigger fear of deprivation, pain and suffering? You may worry about a diet free from unhealthy foods, the physical pain involved in starting an exercise program or the suffering of trying to make good choices when it would be so much easier to have that drink, smoke that cigarette or enjoy that chocolate cake. 

As much as you try to avoid it, you can't help but notice that, in the news again, is the advice to eat more fruits and vegetables and less meat and sugar. It's time to take that advice to heart.

With heartfelt caring for your mind, body and spirit, I suggest an Eastern approach to practicing wellness. I borrow from the Buddhist eightfold path, tenets to apply to your wellness plan. May it ease your suffering and enliven your plan to try: 

Right Speech

Stop undermining your plan by being washy washy about how many times a week you'll get to the gym or whether you can really live without your favorite fast food.

Read more here...

 

No One Regrets Not Eating That Cookie

A client of mine and I spoke recently about the stress of facing the multitude of holiday parties packed with cookies, candy, cakes and other problem foods, just as she was making progress on her new and improved healthy meal plan. She resolved to pass on all the junk, noting, "Coming home from a party, I never regret not eating that cookie." She'll wear a bracelet during the holidays to remind her of that observation. It got me thinking about other non-regrets and ways to be happy this holiday season of giving, love and forgiveness. What are some things that you can give up or add on to make your holidays brighter, cheerier, better and calmer? Here are some suggestions! 

During the holidays, no one regrets:

• Not having that last glass of wine. Maybe three is your limit. If so, now's the time to resolve to stick to it. When you arrive home compos mentis, having passed up that offer to stop for an impromptu holiday drink with your ex, you will not feel bad about passing up the wine. Read more here...

Wellness…Where There's a Will There's a Way

This is a great time of year to take stock of where you are, anticipating those New Year's resolutions to come. I am starting a virtual group: Wellness…Where There’s a Will There’s a Way. Virtual groups are conducted by phone. You can be anywhere.

If you are facing the challenges of getting your wellness plan going, then this group is for you! Figure out what your wellness next step is. Treat yourself, or send a friend to this virtual group.

This 4-session virtual group will help you address the challenges of moving forward with your wellness plan, the will, by helping you find a way to:

* Develop the elements of a personal wellness plan (e.g., exercise, diet, stress-management) that is authentically you

* Use personal strengths and mindfulness to move forward on your goals

* Learn to take the small steps needed to build up your willpower

The virtual group coaching environment will help you use your abilities and resources in unique ways, and challenge you to move ahead.

 

My holiday gift, the first call is free!

Contact me for more information.

Read about Wellness here:

Top 7 Steps to Wellness
The Secret Of Changing Your Life
Authentic Wellness…More or Less
Can Wellness be Fun?

Need a little wellness music? Try Lovely Day.  Bill Withers

Authentic Wellness…More or Less

When people tell me about their current wellness plan, they often tell me about what they should be doing.  I should… run more, sit at the computer less, eat more fiber, eat less junk, get out with friends more, sleep less, sleep more, stress less, get to church more, complain less, meditate more…and so forth.  I’m sure you can, more or less, fill in your own shoulds.  I started wondering how authenticity, as in, being who you are, could help us with wellness behaviors.

We know that repressing how you feel is not good for your health.  Similarly, trying to do things that you really don’t want to do is probably not going to be great for your health.  It may also be why some things you put in your wellness plan are so difficult to achieve.

I’m not suggesting that you embrace your inner couch potato if you don’t exercise enough, or eat whatever feels right to you if you have a weight problem.  I am suggesting that you look at what you’re trying to do and ask yourself if it feels authentic to you.  I know, to some exercise never feels authentic.  To others passing up the dessert never feels authentic.  This leaves us in a bind unless we re-think authenticity.

I’m suggesting a different way to view authenticity.  If you love to run, run.  If you don’t love to run, find something else aerobic.  If you don’t love to lift weights, don’t do it.  But  maybe you’d love lifting you own weight.  You could try yoga.  These are decisions you must make about your wellness plan based on your true feelings.  Ask yourself what decisions you might make to honor your feelings, or truths.

Some people love to sleep more.  Some love to sleep less.  Some prefer staying up and reading or watching movies.  But sleep is necessary and it’s good to honor the amount of sleep you need to function well the next day.  So you may need a rule about reading before sleeping that involves keeping an eye on the clock.  It would honor your truth about your need for sleep, and perhaps compromise on your reading and movie truths.  You can go through the truth or compromise exercise on everything that’s tough in your wellness plan.

Your wellness plan must have rules or routines about eating, exercise, sleep, stress management, socializing, spirituality and work.  You have to ask yourself what your truths are about your needs in these areas.  You have to think about what behaviors would meet those needs in an authentic way.  You’ll find that trying wellness behaviors that meet your needs, and are also authentically you, is going to be a lot easier, more or less, than following the shoulds.

Be For Real. Leonard Cohen

Chocoholics Unite and Get Healthy!

I am an unabashed chocoholic. That being said, chocolate, red wine, health foods? Really? I can certainly agree that most things in moderation are probably fine. Similarly, most things in excess are probably not so good. I’d also have to argue that quick fixes (think crash diets) are usually bogus. Long-term lifestyle changes are the only really credible way to go.

I’m not saying there are not health benefits to various foods that might otherwise be considered problematic. But seriously, “Leafy green vegetables, folate, and some multivitamins could serve as protective factors against lung cancer.” Who are we kidding here? Wouldn’t quitting smoking be the obvious strategy to reduce the risk of lung cancer?

There are many ways to get fit, diet and reduce stress. They take commitment, hard work and a touch of creativity. Another ingredient is to try to make it fun. You don’t have to run, eat celery or meditate. But I challenge you to figure out what you would enjoy and what might be fun (learning to tango, kickboxing, tai chi, macrobiotics?). Then give it a try. Find out what works for you.

Food Glorious Food

Why should we be fated to do nothing but brood on food, magical food, wonderful food, marvellous food, fabulous food/ Oliver! (Lionel Bart)

You can imgine how much time I spend listening to people talk about food. Too much, not enough, dieting, bingeing, purging, weighing, and so on.

What is the obsession we American's have with food, or should I say weight? As one of my psychiatrist colleagues once commented, all American women have at least a sub-clinical eating disorder, and a lot of men too. Which is a fancy way to say we're all a little crazy when it comes to food.

Indeed, generally when I have an idea I want to write about, it just flows. This entry, on the other hand, is slowly creaking along. How could it be that I would have no pithy input on this topic that I hear so much about and spend so much time talking about?

I was a little saddened to hear that the girls in my son's middle school class spent all day getting ready for the school dance. Hair, nails, makeup, I imagine. He, on the other hand, spent all day playing soccer and wandered in late, without time to shower, buttoning his (clean) shirt, apparently not too concerned about how he looked.

The food/weight obsession is linked to our general obsession about physical appearance. Are we that superficial, or does it relate to something deeper?

I am the first to admit that our appearance, be it clothing, hairstyle, weight, etc, signal things to observers. Gender identity, social class and interests, are all conveyed by our appearance. But can you tell whether someone is a caring, intelligent person, with a good sense of humor? I think not.

But could we try being more concerned with these characteristics, and less concerned with appearance? Perhaps the girls could have been reading the newspaper so they'd have something interesting to discuss at the dance. Okay, maybe reading a book? A magazine? Watching a movie? Watching a game? Anything other than worrying about whether to get French nails, tips or whatever?

How about some philosophical advice?

Happiness: a good bank account, a good cook and a good digestion.-- Jean Jacques Rousseau

Quick Fixes

Don't you love the idea of a quick fix? What could be better?

You're tired: This amazing blend of nutrients takes two minutes to gulp down and you're energized.

You stressed, traumatized, anxious: This fantastic creme will restore just the right sense of balance and calm and takes less than two minutes to apply.

You don't have enough endurance: This energy drink will get you through whatever you need to get through, even when dieting.

You can't sleep: This little pill will help you get to sleep and stay asleep all nigh giving you the restorative rest you need.

I could go on to include products to eliminate toxins from you body, increase your youthfulness and make you feel whole.

Reading through one of the magazines in which I often find useful articles, I was astounded by the number of these ads. I guess you can tell where I'm going with this.

Naturally, I cannot argue with the benefits of energy, calm, endurance and sleep. Toxins I'm not quite sure about, and I'd like to see the product that can make us more youthful or whole. Yes, some medications are helpful for insomnia taken for short periods of time under the proper supervision.

But honestly, can we get real with all this? It takes effort to change any lifestyle that results in fatigue, anxiety, lack of energy and insomnia. And that's what's needed. A lifestyle overhaul. A change in direction and focus. A study of how to achieve a health lifestyle for yourself. It will be different for everyone, but it will always include a two pronged attack. The physical aspects of well-being and the psychological aspects must be included in your new life plan.

This probably won't be a quick fix, but it will be a lasting fix.